Praise the Lord. I thank God so much for His mercy among all His people in the entire world and for choosing me to be here today. Not to say that I am well informed, neither so educated nor wealthy being the reasons I am hosted here today. I am here because of the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. I thank God because it did not require anything for me to qualify for His love and neither did it require any academic documents, experience nor wealth. It is purely for His love that I am here. I really thank Him because He allowed my name to also appear on the list of guests to be hosted here. I studied up to Primary 2 and we used to study in turns because we were using the same room with other classes like P.1. That alone is not good enough to bring me here. I don’t remember praying to God about it, neither fasting for it and I do not think that I am even qualified enough to do what I am doing now. The one who has enabled me to be here is the one I give thanks to. Praise God. I became born again in September 1999. I used to cry a lot because I was so troubled after I had lost my husband who left me with very young children.
We had moved to a place away from other family members. We were staying in a grass thatched house which used to leak whenever it rained. The kids were still very young, and we did not even have Vaseline to smear ourselves with and I could not even afford tea for them to drink. My late husband left me in such a bad condition. I was born to Mzee Nathan Rukyeza in Kashari and I was raised in a home of non-born again Christians. I was lucky to be a child of Nathan Rukyeza and his wife Florence Kendeba and I was their first born. They loved me so much being their first child. Being the first-born child, I went through a hard time but Jesus was on my side. My parents were not born again. My mother died in April 1986 when Mzee Museveni had just got into power though she died before becoming born again. My father is still alive. I thank my parents for giving me the name Kobusingye which means ‘’the one with Peace’’ and a Christian name ‘’Jolly’’ those of you who are educated must be knowing what that name means. I was lucky to be born in a big home, very wealthy with many cows. But my father was not interested in educating us, I have already told you the class I stopped in.
I remember my mother tried so much that I could learn how to write so that when time came for me to write a letter to my husband to be, I would not bother asking other people to do it for me and end up discovering our secrets. I thank her so much for teaching me how to read and write and it is the reason I am able to read the bible. Imagine taking your husband’s secrets to another person to read for you!
Sometimes they can give you wrong information. Luckily enough, I was able to read myself when I got a suitor. We were born 14 children but most of them died and we are only 7 left, four girls and 3 boys. Our brother Katana George was killed by a bomb here in Kampala. While I was just starting to enjoy life like any other young girl. Doing chores and looking after cows, weaving, making milk pots covers, then came a man who was interested in me, actually they were quite many who were interested in me. So many of them wrote to me love letters but only one was successful. He was the one the creator chose for me to tell you the truth I did not like him but my father insisted that he was the right one for me. He had authority over me as a father and I also had to obey. He handed me over to him because since he was friends with his elder brothers Kasoma and Rev. Canon Kyamunimba
I remember telling my father that the man was older than me yet there was one whom I thought we looked good together but he insisted that I was to be taken by Kassoma and Kyamunimba’s family. They were the ones he knew.The good thing I was an obedient girl who listened to my parents’ advice so I allowed to marry him, We got married when I was 17 years old and I became a woman. We started a journey as a young couple but we were not yet born again, So every time he went out to cheat on me, I would also cheat on him with my in-laws. He would bring women in our home and sometime he would tell me to get off our marital bed so that he could sleep on it with other women and I would obey. He was so authoritative but that did not bother me. I accepted the situation and I moved on with life. I gave birth to my first child in 1981, the second one in September 1984, the 3rd one 1986 but in between I lost some children. We were very poor and he used to tell me not to give birth again but, I loved many children especially girls and I was giving birth normally. The man did not want me to give birth and so he would even tell other people to come and convince me not to give birth. But inside me I wanted a girl because I only had boys and while I was still contemplating about it, my husband started falling sick. My father’s home was in Mbuga but I got married in Rwanyangwe.
We bought our land after selling cows. And I still own that land. We stayed with my mother Estelle, during her old age and I looked after her by the grace of God. However, life was so hard in that we could hardly afford soap. Soap was for the rich, I used to use ash for washing utensils and clothes and I remember it had an effect on my nails which hurt a lot. There was a bible verse that read; “the thunderstorm was heavy but the Lord overcame it. We could not afford soap. We were married though not born again hence living in the dark. The Lord helped me to overcome all that because I do not remember complaining; all I did was give birth to children. While I had just given birth to my fourth child, it got complications and I lost the baby which was really had for me because we did not even have the money for treatment but I managed to go through all that. It was really hard but I cannot say that it was by my might or wisdom. God knows us, so He knew what I was going through and He gave me the strength to overcome it all. In Isiah 43 it says that; “even though you go through rough waters it will not drown you.” The Lord made me victorious. Imagine I could never go to a hospital in case I fell sick or even ask for a painkiller to cure a mere headache since I knew that he would not give me money, but I was content. I overcame all storms like that of bringing other women and asking me to get off my marital bed.
Every time I shared such stories with fellow women, they would be like that is too much. I would cook and prepare everything for the women he used to bring but before I could finish doing my chores, he would blow out the candle and they started their sexual act. That was a big storm for me but I don’t remember me thinking of leaving the marriage. They would not even wait for me to sleep. They would just start immediately, but I was an overcomer. I did not think of going back to my parents’ home to tell them what was happening.
I hear of girls who run away for marriages just after they have got married. Imagine they can afford to put on sandals, good clothes and to have their hair styled up. I remember there was a time when I did not even have Vaseline to smear on my face and so I would walk very fast so that I could sweat and use the sweat as Vaseline. But God was on my side, and He used to fill me with His grace day and night.
Every time I told people about my story, they would wonder how I managed such a life but I know it was not by my might but God. I was just blessed that my God knew me before I was even conceived in my mother’s womb. My husband would bring women on the mattress that my father gave me as a wedding gift when I got married.
My husband and I did not have anything in the house not even a mattress. So he would call me that morning and tell me that we were expecting a guest that night. Sometimes he would lie to me that the lady he was bringing that night owed him money and since she had failed to pay him, he would sleep with her the whole night as a way of paying back. And stupidly. I would ask him to forgive her. I was so naive because I would not understand what he meant. He knew how soft I was, so I used to plead with him and told him not to do that to her that night and wait for another time. It is as if the Lord had injected me with some anesthetic drug to prevent me from feeling the pain of the challenges I used to face. I never complained even when he did not buy me soap or Vaseline, I kept using my sweat but every time I went to my parents’ home, they would give me Vaseline, soap and many other items to use. I had nice curly hair, so I would just comb it well and go to church. I thank God for protecting me from being overwhelmed by whatever I went through. I stayed by my husband until he died and even before he died, he blessed me. He prayed to God to give me long life. When he said that; “may you not die,” I answered, “do you want me to stay alone on this hill without any money and milk”?
He would then say; “yes I want you to live longer.” He prophesied and said I would live long and look after his children and all would be well. It was not long before he died. He died of AIDS which killed may people those days. Most of the women he used to sleep with in our home, also died of the same. I witnessed all that but still the Lord protected me from knowing what had killed him that time. All I knew was that people who suffered from that disease had red lips and his were not red so I thought it was not HIV. God did that because he knew I would die before him if I had known. That is why I will forever thank God for enabling me go through such life and it was not by my power or might. I cannot even say that it was my strength or wisdom. One day there was a bus accident in Lutoto, in Bushenyi and all the passengers died except one. When they asked him how he survived the accident, he told them that he used a trick. Now honestly speaking, I can’t say that I also had any kind of trick to overcome all those challenges. Jesus knew me long before I was born and He knew that, that would be my home. I thank Him for keeping me alive yet I was not born again, Imagine I had tobacco with me at the altar on my wedding day.
Others left theirs outside the church but for me, I walked in as the wedding march song played with my tobacco hidden in the gown. My husbands did not know that I actually chewed tobacco. Christ gave me the wisdom to keep hiding it from him but one day when my child was 8 months old, he caught me red handed and he decided to send me away. He told his elder brother that he never knew that I smoked tobacco. They say that sin is such an evil act because when he asked me to leave, I was ready to leave my child behind and go continue chewing my tobacco. However, my father-in-law was so understanding, he told them to let me be and said that I would repent of that act when I became born again. And I was never chased away. Sin is such an evil act because I slept with some guy in the bush at a time when I had 2 children already. Evil has no mercy, because it keeps piling one sin after another. Sin is like when constructing a building and you go wrong on the foundation, because then the rest of the work will never look good, It is until experts in building come and break it and start with a good foundation. I continued chewing tobacco, fornicating and doing all sorts of evil things. I was in a bad state for sure. I wanted my husband to stop drinking alcohol and he also asked me to stop chewing tobacco. I told him that alcohol was the cause of all problems in life but defended tobacco chewing alleging that it was a good act.
But anyway I was lucky that I became born again when he had already passed. Actually, I wasn’t lucky but hurt. I was also lucky that my children never caught me red handed in the act of fornication. And I was lucky that they never heard about it from anyone. I am so grateful to God that he keeps protecting us even when we are not born again until he leads us to righteousness. My husband died a long time ago in 1996. I had had 7 children but 2 had passed and I only had 5 left. And they were very young The eldest was just 12 years old.
Others were 10, 9 and below. And I did not know that my husband had HIV. I was only told later that he had tested and found himself positive. When I was told about it that morning, I fainted. I knew that I was going to die. People kept telling me how I was going to die and I also knew that I was dying soon. But I was in a dilemma because I wondered where I was going to leave my young children when I died.
However, there was Almighty God in heaven. The storms were quite many indeed. Imagine we were poor; I was still young, left with very young children and staying in a grass thatched house which used to leak. Those were storms I am talking about. They were heavy storms but the Lord overpowered them. Praise be to God. The Lord was on my side.
Psalms 4,24 reads that; “had He not been on our side and we got attacked by robbers, they would have killed us all.” He was on our side. Indeed, because He protected me. I am so grateful to God because people always thank me for overcoming all those storms yet it was Him.
Praise God. When my husband died the first born was in form 3. I actually cannot explain to you how I did it. A relative was helping us with one of the children. I was lucky because my husband loved to educate his children though for me I was like if we do not have money then so be it. There was a time he walked a very long distance and went to a place called Buremba to meet a relative whom he thought would give some money for the kids’ school fees. Unfortunately, he found them with no money at all. He walked on foot and yet he was sick. I knew my husband too well when it came to educating the children and I am glad they are all learned now. May the Almighty God give him eternal peace? In fact, I thought I was going to die immediately. AIDS those days used to kill people really fast. I still remember the day each one of them died.One died on Saturday and the other on Tuesday the following week. But I am so grateful to God.
